LGBT advocate to speak in Charlotte on Feb. 20.

CHARLOTTE, N.C. – Longtime LGBT advocate Judy Shepard (www.matthewshepard.org), mother of slain 1998 hate crime victim Matthew Shepard, will speak in Charlotte on Sunday, Feb. 20, at Myers Park Baptist Church's Heaton Hall.

The event, which starts at 3 p.m., is co-presented by Campus Pride and Time Out Youth. Shepard, who recently released her memoir, “The Meaning of Matthew: My Son’s Murder in Laramie, and a World Transformed,” will speak with an audience Q&A to follow.

CampusPrideBlog.org editor Matt Comer had the opportunity to speak with Shepard about her advocacy, the relatively new, federal hate crimes legislation that bears her son's name and her message to young people today.

Campus Pride: The new hate crimes legislation passed in 2009 was something you've been working on for more than a decade. Now it is the law of the land. How do you feel about it? Is it perfect? Would you have liked more?
Judy Shepard: I definitely would have liked it sooner. We had eight very discouraging years under the Bush Administration when the gay community couldn't accomplish much and we lost ground and the state and local level. The law won't stop anyone from committing a hate crime, but it does educate and it brings attention to the problem. That's a good thing: Though we know the law won't stop the crimes, education will eventually lessen it, and perhaps in a perfect world would stop it. You know, we have all these laws on the books; if they worked to stop people from committing crimes we wouldn't need prisons. Telling our stories and making them real and human will be what stops these crimes; the African-American Civil Rights Movement has been dealing with the same things for years. We need to get people to understand that people are people and discriminating against them for any reason is not the best way to live your life. Kindness and empathy are the tools that make everybody happier and live a better life. I hope all the discussion and dialogue, that what happened to Matt, and all the work that Campus Pride or the Matthew Shepard Foundation or the Human Rights Campaign does continues to educate.

So, you believe that having laws like these on the books will help to precipitate cultural and social change?
I do. It sends a message of respect and signifies that the federal government acknowledges this issue and understands that there needs to be steps taken to address the issue. The government recognizes that there are special classes and that there is a gay community being singled out for discrimination and harassment. That sends an important message to the American people.

Your book has been a hit, but has it started to play a key role in your advocacy or has it enabled you to connect with portions of the community that maybe you couldn't connect with before the book came out?
We do get a lot of very kind comments and people say they are surprised how honest we were when we told the story. I don't think it has been out long enough to know whether this has been a help. I was doing this work a long time before the book came out.

Do you think parents – of children who are gay or straight – play the key role in making the world safer for all children?
I do. For one thing, they have standing as a parent to protect their children gay or straight and to actually stand up and speak for those who have a voice of their own, whether that's their own children or their children's friends. That's an amazing power, and I see it happening more and more even in Wyoming. Parents play a huge role. Parents of gay kids have a role that is a little bigger; I think they have to show their own kids in both word and action that they understand them and accept them as they are.

Are you encouraged by the growth of teens and young adult straight allies who are speaking out for the rights of LGBTQ people?
I am very encouraged. As I have been speaking around the country and as the years went by, I started noticing more and more straight young people standing up for the rights of everyone. I'm very encouraged, but then you hear something about some youth church group doing the opposite thing. We still have young people who aren't on board and understand that this is a civil rights issue. But that will change. Society is changing. Poll numbers are going up.

Campus Pride, of course, works with LGBTQ and straight ally young people in colleges. But people have this idea that once an LGBTQ young person gets out of high school that everything will be okay. That's not always the case. Why is it important for groups like Campus Pride or even the Matthew Shepard Foundation to continue to reach out and work with young people in college.
That transition from high school to college is hard whether you are gay or straight. I think it is important for gay kids because they might not have been out or comfortable in their high school and need to go to some place that is accepting and comfortable. That's some of the most important work that you all do, publicizing schools and encouraging schools to publicize themselves that they are LGBT friendly. For straight students to understand that their school recognizes equal rights across the board is also very important.

What is your message to young people today?
I think it is important to remember to be true to yourself. That's the most important thing you can do. Also remembering that your friends and your family are a source of support, hopefully. When you look back at my age at those difficult years of junior high school, high school or even college, you'll see the bigger picture and it will feel just like a blip. So, just hold on to your soul and make it through. That's my message.